We didn't have a roadmap. The community wouldn't shut up about it. So now we have one. No whitepaper though. We have standards (low ones).
Great question. We're not totally sure either. But here's what we do know:
Three actual playable browser games. No cap. We built them and everything. You can win real SOL every week if you're not terrible at them.
Buy game credits with $DUMB and 80% gets torched forever. The supply shrinks every time someone plays. Deflationary or whatever the smart people call it.
If you can connect a Solana wallet and mash buttons, you're overqualified. We made it dummy-proof because we are the dummies.
We can't believe we have to explain this but here goes: swap SOL for $DUMB. That's it. That's the whole thing.
Seriously this is not financial advice. We named it DUMB on purpose.
We made it so simple even we can do it. And we're the ones who thought making a token called $DUMB was a good idea.
Swap SOL for $DUMB right here on this site. Hold 100K+ tokens and get 20 free plays per week instead of 5, because we reward commitment to bad ideas.
Connect your wallet at arcade.somethingdumb.xyz. Pick a game. Mash buttons. Pretend you have a strategy. It's free to play.
Think you did good? Pay 0.01 SOL to put your score on-chain forever. Yes, forever. Your grandchildren will see this.
Top 3 split the weekly SOL pool every Sunday. There's even a random "Dumb Lucky" winner so bad players have hope. Payouts are automatic.
You asked for this. Literally hundreds of Telegram messages just saying "wen roadmap" until we broke. Here's what we're doing. Don't say we never gave you anything.
Someone made a token called $DUMB on Pump.fun. Nobody knows who. Nobody knows why. It didn't die. This was not in the plan because there was no plan.
DONE (SOMEHOW)Delicious Sherwin-Williams paint chips. The vintage ones are sweeter. Team spent 3 days debating Eggshell vs Semi-Gloss. Semi-Gloss won (crunchier).
COMPLETED (BURP)Lost two interns and a USB hub before someone suggested "maybe don't livestream while eating soup." Pivoted to a waterproof mic. It sounds terrible. Perfect.
SOLVED (MOSTLY)Multiple Twitter Spaces per week about meme tokens, new projects, and topics we have zero qualifications to discuss. Massive giveaways to bribe people into listening. It's working embarrassingly well.
LIVE & YAPPINGBuilt three actual playable games. 0.01 SOL to submit scores on-chain forever (your grandchildren will see this). Top 3 get paid weekly, plus one random lucky idiot. All payouts automatic because we don't trust ourselves with the money.
HAPPENING NOWFounding team has been coding from a beanbag and a milk crate. Someone's spine made a noise "like a bag of Doritos." HR (the intern's mom) intervened.
IN PROGRESS (LUMBAR SUPPORT PENDING)Live streams 3+ times per week covering real crypto and world news on PumpFun and YouTube. Think CNN but with worse graphics, no credentials, and the anchor is a cartoon egg-potato creature. You'll learn something. Probably.
COMING SOON-ISHBrief moment of self-awareness. Team googled "is it legal to name a token DUMB." Lawyer said "I'm not your lawyer, stop emailing me." We took that as a green light.
ONGOING (PERMANENTLY)Multi-cycle meme token success. More games, more burns, more Spaces, more news, more things we haven't thought of yet. The community will probably demand something else and we'll cave again. This is our life now.
EVENTUALLY (TRUST US BRO)Three browser games you can play right now. Free weekly plays. Connect wallet, compete for SOL, question your life choices. All scores are on-chain so you can't even lie about being bad.
We host Twitter Spaces multiple times a week. Why? Because apparently people will listen to us talk. We're as confused as you are.
We cover meme tokens, new crypto projects, and things we definitely don't fully understand. There are major giveaways to bribe people into showing up. It's working.
Topics include: whatever's trending, who got rugged this week, which coin has the funniest name, and occasionally actual market analysis (by accident).
Live streams every 3 days covering real crypto and world news. Streamed on PumpFun and YouTube. Stay informed. Stay dumb. Here's a preview of the production quality you can expect:
$DUMB has a burn mechanism. That means the supply gets smaller over time. We think that's good? The crypto Twitter people seemed excited about it.
When you buy game credits with $DUMB, 80% of the tokens are burned forever. Gone. Deleted. They're in a better place now.
100 $DUMB = 1 credit. 1K = 15 credits. 10K = 200 credits. The math gets better the dumber you go. We don't make the rules (we do).
Every 0.01 SOL score submission feeds the weekly prize pool. 50% to first, 25% to second, 15% to third, 10% to some random lucky idiot.
The remaining 20% of burned tokens fund the treasury. This pays for games, prizes, servers, and our increasingly expensive therapy bills.
"I solemnly swear that I am up to no good, that I understand this token is called DUMB for a reason, that I will not blame anyone but myself, and that I am here purely for the vibes and the arcade games."
People kept asking "wen roadmap" so aggressively that we caved and made one. Check it out below if you want to see what happens when degens try to plan ahead. Also we have a Telegram full of people who think "buying the dip" is a personality trait. Come vibe with us.
NFA / DYOR
Stay $DUMB
